The F Word

Failure. Ah, that dreaded word that sends shivers down our spines. But let's take a moment to break it down and inject a little humor into the mix, shall we?

According to good ol' Google, failure is defined as "the omission of expected or required action" or "lack of success." Well, isn't that just dandy? It's like a gentle reminder saying, "Hey there, Melissa, you didn't put in enough effort to succeed. Sorry, but it's on you." Talk about a reality check.

But here's the thing: failure isn't the end of the world. It's not like being labeled a failure means you're destined to wear a dunce cap for the rest of your life. No, no, no. You see, there's a massive difference between being a failure and having failed. It's all about perspective, my friend.

Failure is actually the stepping stone to success. Yeah, yeah, I know you've heard that before, but let's really dive into it. Some people fail and keep failing, while others fail and come out stronger, bigger, and better. What's their secret? Well, I believe it's all about how much time you spend failing and growing. It's like the more you fail, the more you start thinking, "Okay, what can I learn from this? How can I improve?" Or maybe some people don't think about it at all—who knows?

Think back to when you were learning to ride a bike. Ah, the memories of scraped knees and wobbly rides. But guess what? Eventually, you stopped falling and failing. You learned from what didn't work and got better at what did. And here's a fun fact: everybody experiences failure, even the successful ones. So, you're in good company!

Now, let's take a little detour to the good ol' days of our childhood. Remember when social media wasn't a thing? No Facebook, Snapchat, or Instagram ruling our lives. Sure, we had Gameboys and Nintendos (and oh boy, the cheat codes for DOOM 2 on PC), but we spent more time climbing trees and playing street hockey. We fell, scraped our knees, and embarrassed ourselves in front of others, but we got back up and kept playing. Ah, the simple joys of being a kid.

But fast forward to today, and social media has taken over. We're constantly bombarded with carefully curated success stories and picture-perfect lives. Even when we try to be transparent, vulnerability is scary. We'd rather post videos of ourselves excelling rather than struggling. But here's the kicker: struggling is necessary for success. It's hard to admit that we don't have it all figured out yet (spoiler alert: nobody does). We forget that those successful people we admire got where they are through hard work and, you guessed it, learning from their failures.

Take weightlifting, for example. We see these incredible feats of strength on social media—big lifts and impressive muscles. But what we don't see is the discipline, the behind-the-scenes grind, and the countless hours spent at the gym instead of hanging out with friends. It's easy to get caught up in the comparison game and feel like a failure because we're not where we want to be. But here's the truth: those successful people have failed too. They've gone through the same ups and downs as you. So, don't be too hard on yourself.

Now, let me challenge you with a thought: What if we changed the definition of failure? Instead of it being "the omission of required action or lack of success," what if it became "not yet sufficient action taken to achieve desired results" or "not yet achieved success"? It's worth pondering, right? Imagine if we could retake tests in school, learn from our mistakes, and grow instead of carrying around that F like a scarlet letter. What if we received a grade of "Not Yet" and spent more time mastering the things we struggle with? It's a game-changer, my friend.

But it's not just about changing the dictionary definition; it's about adopting a growth mindset. Embracing challenges and saying, "Hey, I'm going to figure this out." It's understanding that your abilities can be developed and that failure doesn't define you. You're not a failure; you're simply a person who hasn't yet learned how to succeed. There's always room for growth.

As a coach, some might think my style is too positive or not tough enough. But here's the thing: building confidence, guiding players to discover their own abilities, and showing them that failure is just a stepping stone can take them much farther than yelling and making them feel like failures ever could. It's all about believing in their potential and giving them the tools to succeed.

And let's not forget about the little ones—our future superstars. If we teach kids that failure is the end of the road, they'll lose confidence and cheat their way through challenges. But if we show them that failure is an opportunity for growth, we'll change their mindset. We'll foster persistence, determination, and the belief that they can always improve.

So, my dear reader, thank you for joining me on this journey through failure, success, and the power of perspective. Remember, failure is not the end—it's a chance to learn, grow, and become better than ever before. Embrace the challenges, adopt a growth mindset, and watch as the world becomes your playground. Much love to you all!